


Aloe

by ghoulhunt



Series: Of Herbs and Affections [2]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Winter, first I love you, tsukiyama centric mostly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-08 03:07:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5481020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghoulhunt/pseuds/ghoulhunt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Protection. Affection.<br/>Shuu needs to know if Ken can trust him.<br/>He needs to know that he loves him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aloe

The sun is bright in the winter afternoon, but it brings cold. There is light, powdery snow all over the ground, and a thin sheet of ice along the pavement. Many people are wrapped in layers of clothing, scarves, jackets, and fur lined boots to keep themselves warm; hats and mittens don on the small children playing carelessly in the park, throwing balls of the tightly packed material at each other.

Shuu is currently wrapped up in several layers himself: a thermal shirt, a sweater, a scarf, a jacket, and a hat that is pulled over his ears in an attempt to keep warm. One of his hands holds a cup of steaming coffee, and the other his hidden underneath his jacket, holding Ken Kaneki’s hand.

Kaneki has become an important part of his life, he has realized. Even if he is too shy to admit that Kaneki is one of the only people he truly cares about, and wants to protect, even if it means that he himself is killed somehow in the process. Kaneki is the one who, Shuu knows, once didn’t trust him; was told not to trust him because of the things he done in the past. He is the one who was at one point using him for information, and not even considering him as a friend, and more of an acquaintance, or imbalanced relationship. Kaneki, Shuu knows, has tried to overcome that feeling of distrust.

For the most part, Kaneki has. Even if there’s a small, tiny part of him that still doesn’t think that Shuu could possibly care for him as a ghoul- _person_ -after what he had tried to do at the ghoul restaurant; an item, a dish, a _meal._ Something as unique as him, slipping right under his nose for the past few weeks until he had finally gotten to him.

But Shuu realizes that he needs redemption. Kaneki didn’t deserve that. That wasn’t just what Shuu was feeling. It was a need, need, needing feeling that he had grown up with that made him feel as though he just had to get his hands on this new half ghoul with the black-now-white hair in a way that would make him feast. It wasn’t that type of feast he wanted though. It wasn’t that he wanted to try and eat the ghoul at all.

He simply hadn’t realized that he may have actually _liked_ Kaneki at that point.

But now, he realizes. He realizes as their relationship has evolved into something along the lines of _love_ , even if there are a few strings unattached, and Shuu hopes that he can prove himself to Kaneki. Prove himself by trying to be more open and showing that he would go to the end of the world for Kaneki, because to Shuu, that is all that matters at this point.

He is reminded of all of this as he looks to the side and sees the white haired ghoul, with his small medical eyepatch on and his eyes distant, but soft; his lips chapped at further looking and his skin warm underneath his own.

Kaneki holds his own cup of coffee, face buried in his own scarf, hair tucked neatly underneath his own hat. They stand close and hold hands as they walk down the familiar street that used to be their spot on campus, where they would do nothing but sit and talk and get to know each other in those beginning stages.

Shuu finds the place he’s been looking for; where the rocks border a small garden with mulch and skinny, winding branches that cascade from the trunk of a few trees in the center. It overlooks the small square where the lawn is and a few picnic tables as well, one of the campus buildings also in sight. The place they used to sit is covered in snow.

The bench next to it, luckily, is not.

Shuu brings Kaneki over to the bench. He feels like they have been walking for a very long time, which, technically, they have: they had walked all the way from where Tsukiyama’s apartment was, then to a small coffee shop that definitely wasn’t Anteiku, and down to here, where the campus was practically empty due to winter break.

The two sit down, and Kaneki lets out a small breath of air. “It’s been a while since we’ve been here.”

Shuu nods in agreement. “That was mostly the reason I decided to come here. It’s refreshing, sometimes.”

Kaneki is quiet. Shuu silently hopes he hasn’t done anything wrong.

“…I suppose it is. It brings me back.” His words are muffled beneath the scarf.

Shuu chuckles in response. He’s trying to lighten the mood, the strained mood, where he knows that everything but _this_ is on his mind at the moment and is focused on instead everything that will happen.

“Ken, I want you to be happy. You know this, right?”

Again, Kaneki is quiet. He turns to face Shuu, with a small smile on his face. “Of course I’m happy, Tsukiyama. I’m happy with you.” In reassurance, he squeezes Shuu’s hand.

Shuu can smell the lie radiating off of him.

“ _Non,_ my love. I really, really want you to be happy for one moment. Please stop thinking of everything else. It’s too stressful, I can see it in your eyes.” He pauses for a moment to sip at the coffee in his other hand. “You need a day off from what’s going on.”

“…you are right. I need to focus on you right now. On this.” Ken concedes as he leans his head against Shuu’s shoulder.

“You are stressed.” He observes.

“I am. I needed to get away from…that. Thank you.”

Thank you.

It’s the words that Shuu has been needing to hear. He wanted to know that Ken was okay. He wanted to know that he was doing something right for Ken, even if they were such little words. Kaneki is okay with this. Kaneki wanted something like this.

_Kaneki is okay._

His head tilts up to look at Shuu. His showing eye is bright and large, twinkling with interest and something along the lines of affection or admiration, pouring deep into Shuu’s soul. Sharing everything that Ken only knows for himself; how he feels about the one sitting next to him, looking back down at him, knowing that for each other, they will be there to protect.

Clouds have rolled in, and snow has started to fall between them. Shuu is humming a gentle song. Ken is sensing the vibrations coming from the tall ghoul, sending a tremolo into his own chest as he hears the soft, deep voice of Shuu.

Shuu takes another sip of his coffee. Kaneki takes a sip of his own, and brings his legs up to his chest. Shuu sees his face, clearly, sees the white snowflakes blending into the hair of the small ghoul, and a clump landing on his eyelashes.

He laughs. He laughs and takes the hand that was holding Ken’s to caress his cheek.

“There’s something on your eyelashes, my love.”

“I love you too.”

 _I love you_.

It confuses Shuu. He doesn’t think Ken meant to say that. But…it’s something he’s never heard before. It’s something that engrosses him. It’s something that Ken has blurted out, looking anxious, as a smile spreads amongst Shuu’s face.

“I love you more.” Shuu replies as he watches the clump melt.

Ken shakes his head, a true, real smile on his face, for the first time in a very, very long time.

“I doubt that.”

It feels like the world is complete.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Aloe means protection, and affection.  
> I was hoping this would turn out better but it was written in one of those writer hazes where everything just falls into place nicely even if it's all over the road to the reader.


End file.
